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Thursday, August 27, 2009
An Open Letter to White Liberals From a Black American
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Dear White Liberal America,
Thank you very much. We poor, helpless, inferior blacks...hold that thought. I must be politically correct. We African Americans want to thank you white liberals for helping us, using your superior intellect. After all, we could not possibly succeed in this racist, homophobic and greedy country without your assistance.
I first met you guys in the 1970’s while I attended the prestigious Maryland Institute College of Art on a scholarship. A black kid from the ghetto, I found myself amongst white kids from well-to-do families. I worked a part-time job to cover the costs of my books and art supplies. The majority of you white liberals did not have to work.
Submitted by Lloyd Marcus © Copyright 2009 B22 Media
© Copyright 2009 B22 Media, LLC
COMMENTS
And yet, I remember many conversations about how you would never bring a child into this “freaking world” and how “freaking screwed up” this “freaking country is”. You told me how “freaking selfish” your “freaking parents” were and how they only cared about “freaking money”. Then, you drove off in your convertible, given to you by your “freaking parents”, as I stood at the bus stop.
I can not thank you enough for the numerous times you shared your expensive primo weed with me. While I enjoyed the free weed (of which I've long ceased to indulge) and rebellious chicks, in all honesty, I could not figure out what you were so angry about.
Now you former hippie boomers are in total control of government, colleges and public schools, still selling your utopian message of peace and love. Thanks for eliminating black fathers in the home through your generous welfare programs. Ultimately, everybody knows dads are cruel chauvinists who beat and molest their kids.
In addition, thanks for encouraging schools to accept black kids speaking ebonics instead of intelligible English. It would be racist to expect us simple-minded colored folks to learn to speak English correctly. And besides, we don't want our black kids sounding too white. Authentic blacks must sound like we come from the hood, love rap music and cherish Kentucky Fried Chicken. I would never trust any black person that eats sushi; which is probably what those traitors, former Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice and Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas eat. If Justice Thomas had answered his phone with a “What up!” and a heartfelt “A-muri-ka” sucks, the NAACP would have championed him as a true brother, faithful to his blackness. Sadly, Ms. Rice and “Uncle Thomas” chose the character, education and work ethic route to success. How disgusting.
Yes, you liberals are so good to us. I really appreciate talent-challenged actresses like Janeane Garofalo putting that Uncle Tom, RNC Chairman, Michael Steele in his place, saying he suffered from Stockholm Syndrome. How dare Mr. Steele not view himself as a victim of white America? How dare he empower young blacks with the knowledge that success is attainable without liberal intervention? What an ungrateful, well, you know the word I'm thinking. It begins with an “N”.
In closing, it is my hope that you liberals keep up the good work. With your continued diligence, most Americans and we minorities can rest easy in the knowledge that we don’t have to work or be responsible for anything. President Obama is in the process of confiscating the wealth from those greedy, rich, white capitalists and redistributing it to us black American victims.
Now, if I could only figure out how to tie my shoes all by myself. No matter. If I can't, I know you liberals will be there for me. Fighting back tears of overwhelming gratitude, again, I thank you.
Cordially yours,
Lloyd Marcus
Lloyd Marcus is currently touring with the TeaPartyExpress Aug. 28th – Sept. 12th
Check his website to see when Lloyd is coming to your town.
